- weirdo

Everyone got their pain inside the heart.
Looking at them suffer of their love one, i felt so numb that can't help them at all.
What i surprise that i got a message that said :
" Friendship is not about whom you have known the longest. It's about who came, and never left your side "
He meant that thanks you im always by his side to cheer him up and never leave him alone.
I'm thinking, why i just can't leave him alone and go busy for my stuff?
Somehow i want to pull off myself from naive friendship because been getting hurt again and again from friends.
It's all because I too care my friends.
I don't even know to love myself first then only friends...
What i wan to do is they are happy enough , and i don't care a shit of fuck about my own feeling =.=''

Well, a kinda of weird feeling toward my heart , my mind ..
May be recently too many thing have to handle ...
family, work , future , money, healthy and so on ...


Day 70